To Darlene -
For the fourteen years of our marriage, God has seen fit to bless us in unimaginable ways. Once again, this year – I am given to write you a sonnet, plagiarized, though it may be. I hope it can express my love to you better than through a card.
These words, though not in foresight of my death, express my heartfelt love.
Sullivan Ballou, a Major of the 2nd Rhode Island Volunteers, fought for the Union cause. On July 14, 1841, he wrote a letter to his beloved wife two weeks before the Battle of Bull Run.
Sarah, my love for you is deathless, it seems to bind me with mighty cables that nothing but omnipotence can break; and yet my love of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me irresistibly with all those chains to the battlefield. The memory of all the blissful moments I have enjoyed with you come crowding over me, and I feel most deeply grateful to God and you, that I have enjoyed them for so long. And how hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes and future years, when, God willing, we might still have lived and loved together, and see our boys grown up to honorable manhood around us.
If I do not return, my dear Sarah, never forget how much I loved you, nor that when my last breath escapes me on the battle field, it will whisper your name...
Forgive my many faults, and the many pains I have caused you. How thoughtless, how foolish I have sometimes been!
But, 0 Sarah, if the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they love, I shall always be with you, in the brightest day and in the darkest night... always, always. And when the soft breeze fans your cheek, it shall be my breath, or the cool air your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by.
Sarah do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for me, for we shall meet again...
Sullivan Ballou was killed one week later in the 1st battle of Bull Run.
If I could live every day as though it were my last it would be with these thoughts. I love you and am the most blessed of men to have you in my life.
Love,
Mark
June 6, 2006
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1 comment:
Mark, this was my first chance to read your thoughts to Darlene on your anniversary. You definitely are a chip off your father's block. You have his sensitivity and tender heart. May you always be sensitive to the feelings of others.
Love you,
Mom
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